Jokes VS Insults
by RaVeN.RoTh16
Summary: Beast Boy tells jokes. Raven insults him. That's the way the world works... right? So, how far does the Earth tilt when Beast Boy insults her back ten times worse? Enough to make her kiss him? What? Rated T for one teensy little curse word.


**I'm going to go ahead an apologize in advance for the many grammatical and spelling mistakes you will no doubt come across. I wrote this in WordPad before I found Microsoft Word. He heh he...**

**But enough with the fancy talk. So, basically, this is one of the many warped ideas that I get when day dreaming in health class. Woo man, you do _not_ want to see all those wads of paper. Yeah, there was this one I started where Speedy was gay and going out with Aqualad, but then he saw Starfire walk into class (they're at high school) and begins to question his sexuality. (I "lost" that paper so you have little to no hopes of that ever becoming a story. ...Unless you really want it too... jk jk! XD) And there was this one about CPR... yeah you don't even want to know about that one. I still have it though, so that one could very well possibly become another one-shot.**

**Whoa that little smiley thing looks like it has a double chin. See: XD) OMG I JUST INVENTED A NEW SMILEY FACE!!! Or has that been availible all along and I'm just nieve? (How the heck do you spell that!?!)**

**Oh yeah! Here you go!**

* * *

"Hey guys, guess what!" Beast Boy was standing on top of the table in the common room, waving his arms in the air and jumping up and down like a crazy person.

Everyone else looked up from what they were doing and stared. Starfire was _attempting _to cook something, Raven was reading, and Cyborg and Robin had been playing video games, (Robin get horribly beaten) before Beast Boy had gotten up on the table and blocked their view.

Raven looked back at her book and said in her normal monotone, "Do we dare ask?"

Beast Boy ignored her and continued, "I got some really good jokes! I bet they will even make _you_ laugh Raven!"

Cyborg muttered a "yeah right" while Robin said, "Beast Boy, get off the table,"

Raven mumbled, "Yeah, your going to break it."

Beast Boy unwillingly hopped off the table and glared at Raven. "Well then! I'm gonna tell my jokes anyway. Ahem," he cleared his throat and began.

"What does a cat sleep on? A caterpillow!"

No one laughed.

They all stared at him with annoyed looks. All but Starfire, that is. She looked confused.

"What does a king do when he burps? He issues a royal pardon!"

More silence.

"What happens when two snails fight? They slug it out!"

Finally, someone spoke. It was Raven. "Ordinary people live and learn. Looks like you just live." That got a couple of laughs out of the other Titans.

_'Did she just insult me for fun?'_ Beast Boy thought, but continued with his jokes. "What is hail? Hard-boiled rain!"

"Some drink from the fountain of knowledge. I guess you only gargled." A few more laughs rang out. Cyborg in particular thought that was funny.

Now Beast Boy was getting a little angry, no matter how used to her insults he was. Trying to come up with his best jokes, he now aimed his jokes at Raven, glaring. It sort of ruined any hint of them being funny.

Raven also looked at Beast Boy, wondering why he was _still_ telling his ridiculous jokes.

"What's the strongest bird? A crane."

"Your about as bright as Alaska in December."

"What insect is good at math? An account-ant."

"I guess you got into the gene pool when the lifeguard wasn't looking."

"What wobbles as it flies? A jelly-copter."

"If we gave you a penny for your thoughts we would get change."

The other Titans heads moved back and forth trying to follow the strange conversation, with an occasional chuckle, chortle, or hee haw. Which was never because of Beast Boy's jokes. Starfire, however, didn't understand half of what they saying.

Poor Starfire.

"If two collars had a race, how would it end? In a tie."

"Huh, did you hear something? That sounded like your last brain cell dying."

"What kind of lettuce did they serve on the Titanic? Iceberg."

"Why don't you just open your mind and shut your mouth. They're both empty anyways."

"What do you call four matadors in quicksand? Quatro sinko."

"You said you were a ladykiller. You're right. They take one look at you and die of shock."

"Why do pigs make good spies? They're good at going in-hog-nito."

"I would call you an idiot, but that would be an insult to all the stupid people,"

Now Beast Boy was mad. _'Why is does she keep insulting me like this?!' _He thought, then continued, with more intensity.

"Oh yeah?! How did the artist paint a picture? Easel-y!"

"You couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel."

"How did the ghost patch up his sheet? With a pumpkin patch!"

"Are you always this stupid, or are you putting out more effort today?"

"How do french poodles greet each other? Bone-jour!"

"_Your_ antenna doesn't pick up _any_ channels."

"How do you have a party in space? You plan-et!"

"I think you donated your body to science before you were done using it."

Then, for some reason, Beast Boy snapped. He was fuming! He stomped his foot and to stormed over to Raven, coming up with some insults of his own. "You know what Raven? Your right, something terrible _did_ happen when you were born. You lived! Some day you'll finally find yourself, but you'll be disappointed. The only thing keeping me from breaking you in half, is that I don't want two of you. You've got a great personality, but not for a _human being_. No wonder your half-demon. So tell me, as an outsider, what do you think of the human race? I don't know what made you so screwed up, but it worked. I think we can both agree that we wish your parents had never met!"

By the time he had finished his long string of insults, he was face to face with Raven. He had backed her up against the far wall, and was now pinning her to it. _'Beast Boy?' _she thought.

The other Titans thought it best for them to interfere now.

It took Cyborg and Starfire both to pull Beast Boy off of her, and Robin used his handy dandy gagets to tie him up. A concerned and confused Cyborg asked, "Yo man, what's gotten into you? You never act like that towards Raven."

Robin cut in, "Yeah, you looked like you were about to rip her head off. Or... nevermind."

Cyborg looked at Robin with a questioningly raised eyebrow. Robin answered by raising both his eyebrows and nodding towards Raven. Cyborg mouthed _Ooooh_. He caught the drift.

Poor Starfire, she back and forth between the two. Quite confused. She usually was.

"I am... out of it. Correct?" She asked.

"...."

They had all but forgotten Raven, wide-eyed and trying to recover from what Beast Boy said. No one had seen that coming, but he cut her deeper than she wanted to show.

Beast Boy stopped struggling long enough to shot a glare at Raven. But all his hate and hostility melted when his eyes met hers.

Raven had never shown much emotion before, but there was no holding back what she felt at this moment. Beast Boy didn't need to be an empath to see what she was feeling. Her eyes never lied. And as he gazed deep into them, he saw everything she was trying to hold back.

Hurt

Shame

Guilt

Fear

Now Beast Boy felt guilty as he noticed tears threatening to show in her eyes. Her steel wall was deteriorating - and fast. Raven noticed his unreadable stare and forced an icy glare before phasing through the floor. _'Crap,' _Beast Boy thought,

_'Now I'm going to have to apologize.'_

Cyborg and Starfire had long let go of Beast Boy by now and had left the room on Robin's orders. "Beast Boy," Robin started, "we need to talk."

Beast Boy held up a hand as he stood. "Save the lecture, Rob. I know, I know. Apologize." He sighed heavily, and turned for the door.

The teen leader's face twitched in anger. "Hey!" He shouted.

Beast Boy whipped back around. "What." He spat back at him.

Robin was bound and ready to scream at him, give him about ten extra hours of training to do, and put him on Teen Titan probation, but something stopped him. He didn't soften his face. He relax his stance. He just decided to save it for a later hour. "You apologize _now_." He commanded. "That's an order!" That was all Robin could do to keep his temper in check.

"I know," Beast Boy mumbled through clenched teeth.

_Eleven ('cause it's cooler than ten) minuteslater_

"This _sucks_! I hate apologizing! And to Raven, of all people!" Beast Boy blew up and had to get it all out before he reached Raven's room. When he was done, he sighed and ran a hand through his dull green hair; he's been growing it out and it currently covered the back of his neck and nearly his eyes. He looked up and listlessly knocked on the door in front of him, marked Raven.

When he didn't get an answer, he knocked again. And again. "Open up Raven!" And again. "Raven I've gotta tell you something." And again. "For real this time! I swear it's not a prank!" Again and again. "I came to apologize, in case you were wondering, and yeah, Robin made me. But I was going to anyways, I swear!" He said a second time, then paused and pounded on the door instead of knocking on it. "Dammit, Raven open this door!" His patience was completely ran out by this time, and he slipped under the door as a fly.

"Raven I told you I-" He stopped and noticed the room was empty. Of course, there was her normal furniture and belongings in there (not that he knew what the inside of her room looked like or that her mirror was on her dresser where it was suppossed to be, making it impossible for her to be in Nevermore. Hehe... he...), but no Raven. "Raven?" He said aloud, confused for only a second. "Raven!" He growled, surprising even himself at his utter change in tone and sprinting for the door that leads to the roof.

Only after he flung open the door and it banged very loudly against the wall did he realize he had no idea what he was going to say. "Crap." He muttered under his breath, but his tone changed again. "Whoa."

Raven was indeed on the roof. She was, as he suspected, meditating. Her cloak was undoubltably off, and this could be excused due to the fact that it was unbearably hot. But it also was, as he had _not _suspected, sunset, and it was most definetly a Kodak moment.

The setting sun splashed an array of colors across the sky- stunning shades reds, purples, oranges, and pinks. The last truly golden rays highlighted Raven's figure perfectly. Her body shaped and curved in all the right places. Dispite the fact that her back was turned to him, she was still- in his eyes -shockingly beautiful, and he didn't see how anyone would think differently.

Beast Boy's thoughts further clouded by shock and hormones, he accidently uttered and "uhh." He quickly learned what a drastic mistake this was.

Upon hearing two unexplained noises (first a bang, then a voice), she lashed out with her dark powers and slammed her dark energy into the stranger, sensing it was Beast Boy a fraction of a second too late. Her eyes, glowing a striking white, dimmed and revealed their usual amethyst. "Beast Boy?" She said, reaching out for his form, stuck in the concrete wall. (But not before whipping her cloak back on her body.) "What are you doing up here?"

She had to help yank him free before he could respond. "Robin-"

"Told you to apologize. I know."

"Then why'd you-"

"Let me start." This statement hushed the green teen. "I'm sorry I lashed out at you earlier."

Beast Boy raised an eyebrow. "What about now?"

Raven clenched her jaw. "Don't push it."

"Yeah, I'm sorry too. Even if you kind of deserved it."

"What kind of apology is that?!"

"Hey, hey, hey," He raised his hands up in defense. "I deserved it too. So let's not fight now." He pointed up to the camera Raven hadn't noticed. _'I didn't know we had a security camera there...'_ She thought. Beast Boy continued. "I can promise you Robin and probably Cyborg are watching."

"Oh," She replied, unsure of how to continue, untill something came to her. Or rather, dropped a boulder of an idea on her mind. Unfortunately, certain emotions were all over it. "Then let's give them something to watch." She smirked and grabbed his shoulders, before planting her lips firmly on his.

Beast Boy's eyes widened to about the size of the rims on the T-car and his whole body stiffened as he "mmm"ed in shock and protest. She wrenched herself off of him and spun for the door without another word, only a confident smile. Meanwhile, Beast Boy's lips were still in kissing position, frozen in place like Starfire in front of a strobe light. But in the middle of staring off into space, he swore he saw- for only a second, mind you -Raven's cloak flash bright pink.

_Also meanwhile, in whatever room they watch the security videos in_

Cyborg managed to refrain from his laughing fit long enough to glance down at the passed out Robin on the floor among random tangles of stray and connected wires and cables. Of course, this only made him laugh harder. "Oh man," he said, wiping happy, histerical tears from his eyes, "that was great! Happy has _got _to take over more often." Apparently, he too saw Raven's cloak change to pink for a split second.

Robin groaned and sat up, holding his head. "What happened..." He opened his eyes (err... mask) just in time to see the horrific kiss in instant replay, courtesy of Cyborg. Needless to say, he fainted.

* * *

**I love unresolved endings! I mean, its hilarious _and_ it has no closure! There's no endings better than that! Of course, this only applies to when I'm writing it and New Moon. You know, because its so over dramatic. I, for one, think it should be put in comedy. It's so frickin' hilarious!!**

**Anyways, please review! :{D Moustache!!!**


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